, but doesn't care that the limited one I do haveis on a hard drive 3,000 miles away. He just let's me tick off work inthe family business, part-time...at Sainsbury's while I'm studying, and myexam results and other educational awards. At my mention of university,he jovially says he needs "to check my I.D." When I hesitantly (becauseof the name and picture in it) hand him my passport and mention I have nowork permits, I expect that should be enough to terminate the interview.But he only raises. ..S: Come on! Lets see how they fit you.Susan didn?t wait for my answer and led me to an empty dressing room.S: Come on, go in and try those on.I did just that and was checking myself out on the mirrors when Susansaid:S: Are you done? Come out so I can see.Once again I obeyed and got out to stand in front of her.S: Ah.. I see...N: What?S: How do you feel about your appearance?N: Ok I guess, I always wear things like this.S: May I suggest an option?N: What do you mean?S: Wouldn't you like to. I need to face reality? I need to move on? Excuse me, but grief does not affect everyone the same way.Fuck him! I am angry and sad, and I miss her like hell! There, I've said it.I can't even remember her face, and I'm starting to forget her voice. I am a forty-year-old former Naval Officer, and I am stronger than this. I just need some time to be alone for a while. I'll keep writing in here, though because this does make me feel better.Nobody want's to hear me go on and on about the past. I can. I discovered that most call girls are amateurish at fellating a man and have some undesirable tricks they use to conceal their feelings about the client’s semen from him. But if they are taught correctly, they grow to love it! And I would train them to do it the way my French girl friend did it. I fantasize having a training session with redheads, blondes, brunettes, blacks, Orientals, and Latin girls – all beautiful and lusty, with the types of bodies I like. First the girl should have her.
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