I acted quickly and tried to make him jealous by falling into the black man's lap. I acted ditzy and brought the black guy a free rounds of drinks. ... started really flirting and rubbing the black man's arm seeing James look on with a sly smile.When closing time came around, the whole bar was very drunk, including me. I was basically handing out free booze and drunkenly trying to make James jealous by throwing myself at the chubby black man, Melvin. Melvin said liked movies and I agreed. . Lisa was 22 I was 20. I knew,logically, that the probability of us being a permanent couple wasslight but the thought of us not being together hurt. I wanted this tolast and yet I was scared by the thought. Lisa wanted too much from me.Earlier in the week we had gone out to dinner and then she drilled me onsome math. During the drills her hand slowly crept up my leg and after Ibrushed it away a few times I reminded her that when she was studying Ikept my hands to myself. She waited until we. Even this awareness is not stopping the lust. The need. The insanity. How can I feel in heaven when he tells me he will talk to me after my mother goes to sleep?My mother announces her arrival and all I want to do is crawl in my bed and curl like a ball and just think about what happened. I wouldn't even need to touch myself. Not at first.Can't do that. I have to pretend I'm fine. She might think I'm still sulking over my breakup, but I don't want to take any chances. I get dressed, and as I do. I asked. Big mistake. He left screeching tires, calling all the attention I tried to avoid. Oh my God… I muttered. What now? He asked, looking worried. I just didnt want to attract any attention… I answered. Oh… Well, sorry. When someone asks me to hurry… He said in an apologetic way. Seconds later we both burst into laughter. The trip home was completely silent. I was tense enough to keep my mouth shut and he seemed focused on something else, but every single stop at the traffic he looked at.
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