Then she suddenly had her arms around me and hugged me very close and tight. It was a bit awkward but also very nice. Actually I was very comfortable ...n Nanas presence and company.Nana gave me a soft kiss on my forehead and whispered into my ears:"I wish I could have been your mom. I would have loved that". Then she straightened up, crossed her lovely legs and looked out in the room saying:"Sorry, I'm just so old fashioned in many ways"."Don't be sorry, I think you a wonderful person".Different. When he reached thirty, he got out of bed. "That does it," he said."No!"He ignored her. She considered going after him, but it was too late. She heard his footsteps padding down the hall. Voices came through the wall, muffled. Stephen said, "What's wrong kitten?"Sarah's little voice was choked with tears: "The monster! The monster is in my closet again!" Oh, kitten, there's nothing there." Will you look and see?" There's nothing there baby, I promise. Remember your mom and me are right down the. Why was that such a scary thought? Fear of rejection? Well, I should be used to that by now. Except, I always took comfort in the idea that they weren't really rejecting me, because they didn't really know the 'real' me. They were rejecting my version of 'the boyfriend'.I was slowly realizing, that playing the boyfriend was a dead end, had always been a dead end, and if I ever wanted something like long-term happiness I'd have to be honest with them and myself. I'd have to learn how to be. "Would you consider donating to the Children's Lupus fund? You can receive a bracelet for any donation amount," she said as she showed off a cute stretchy bracelet with small hearts on it.I gave her five dollars and she handed me the bracelet. She wandered off as I sat contemplating my new wardrobe dilemma. I finally decided to slip the bracelet onto my wrist, and lay down on my stomach. Taking a deep breath, I reached back and unhooked my bra, sliding my straps down over my arms taking care.
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