She didn't mean who I had slept with; she and the whole world knew about that, thanks to Samantha. She meant who I felt guilty about. I nodded. She ki...sed me softly. "Good. You needed to get that cry out." First of all," she told me, "you don't have any need to feel guilty about Cindi. She was upset, and more importantly, saw you were upset and took the opportunity to help you. It was sweet, what she did. I'm just surprised Amy wasn't in on it too. They have wanted you for years; they just knew. How I felt like a completely different person when I was dressed inthese simple things. How I felt alive! But then I would have tremendousfeelings of guilt and shame and throw everything out. And then startthe whole process over again a few months later when I couldn't containthe urge to dress anymore.Katie looked at me lovingly. Not like a lover but more like a sister.Someone who was there for anything I needed. She simply asked, "Isliking it the real reason you seem to be fighting this. Thing was, Josh was always rather simple minded. I couldn’t quite describe it fully, it’s just that he has an ego that was inflated to the point of occasionally being obnoxious, but at the same time, it was predictable. He had a habit of glorifying himself in some way, often with fantastically fictitious feats or fundamentally simple things or what have you…and either he actually believes it or he’s really fibbing through his teeth. Maybe it was just his budding boy superiority complex, I. I ate earlyand decided to have a bath and try to relax, also a fewgin and tonics… more than I should have had too. Ilay in the bath thinking and drinking for probably anhour, and by the time I emerged I was very relaxed…Ilooked in the mirror at myself and then decided todress sexily… why not? Not for Norman or the dog, butfor me.I wanted and needed to feel good. Black suited me well,and black underwear with black stockings seemed to fitthe bill topped by a slinky black number.
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