. It was a risk which didn’t bare thinking.…………………….THURSDAYI came home from work knowing ‘he’ would have been. He wouldn’t m...ss out on his afternoon chat. Plus, he’d promised a ‘fitting’, with a costume he’d acquired a couple of years ago and which he assured me would look great on my wife. “What did he bring for you to try on?” I asked, as Debbie marched in from the kitchen, still in a prickly humour. It seemed I was still out of favour, not having sated her pregnancy. This was not something I ever asked for and I never wanted it. Memories from late high school through my entire life of a desire I hated yet loved. I looked into Chelsea’s crystalline glossy eyes. “Can you help me?” I asked.“With what daddy, tell me?”I could not ask her to help me stop loving her. But if I wanted this to stop, I had already proved that years of lonely suppression was not enough. I alone could not help myself destroy the disease.“Can you help me stop liking girls your age?”“No!. I jumped as I felt his weight on the bed then his hands on my head.Carefully he was working something into place and as the light I couldsee through my eyelids faded I realised it was a rubber blindfold."You have been a very good girl Davina.....my PVC slut!" he crooned in myear.His weight lifted from the bed and then silence. I strained to hear him,work out what he was doing. Time seemed to stand still as my hearthammered in my chest. I could hear slight movements and then it dawned onme he. Cindy. Who happens tobe a girl. He gave me some tests, and said I'm one of thosepeople who psychologically is neither strongly male or female. Hesaid I'm more male that female, but not enough to recommend Ichange how I live. In his words, if it isn't broken, don't fixit.He did say I will have some social problems unless I remainsingle and unattached, or can accept being considered by most asa lesbian. I had already made that decision, so it is not aproblem." I took a deep breath, and looked at.
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