. it just made me not care about anything or anyone.”She nodded struggling not to cry loud and just hugged me. “I’m sorry I let you down,” sh... said. “You didn’t let me down mom. I let myself down.”She held me tight and stroked my hair and rocked with me and I felt horribly guilty for what I was doing to practically everyone I knew. I knew then I had to change. She held me a little longer then headed back downstairs. I somehow managed to sleep that night without a nightmare. I wasn’t. Nate had a bit of a one track mind at times. “Yes, Nate, I got laid. None of your business, of course,” I responded. “Oh come on,” he answered giving me a nudge, “Just a tidbit. Someone you met at the conference? Someone you picked up after hours?” “I’ll tell you her first name and that’s all,” I said. “Okay. That’s a start.” “Jennifer,” I answered and flashed him a wicked grin before quickly walking away. “No way, man,” he called after me, “Your ex?” I stopped and turned back. “She’s. " Don't bet on it," Susana interrupted. "That bitch hates us, Dad. She is jealous of me because I have access to more money than she does. She hates you because you won't roll over and be her sub. She's a power freak." You know better than I, sweetheart. I spent the past year buried in an alcoholic haze." Jeff reached over and patted her shoulder. "I believe we should prepare for a worse case scenario." Let's take a nap and discuss this later." Susana stood and grabbed Jeff's hand.Jeff followed. "I know it was probably hard for you." You asked to be the lead, so what else could I do?" Aaron replied and shrugged. "It is what you wanted. What you needed to do." I realize that in the end it did not really matter," Anna replied. "Not to disparage you, but I realized that is not me. I cannot be a cold blooded killer." No insult taken," Aaron shrugged. "I know what I am, what I have become and I can live with it. I had always hoped to shield you from that. I must admit however that finding.
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